The 24 Weirdest Marvel Merchandise Items Ever Released
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This stuff is weird.
The odds of Marvel movies going out of style is very slim. After all, the Marvel Cinematic Universe is going to keep on chugging after Avengers: Infinity War and Avengers: Endgame, and Fox is likely going to keep pumping out as many X-Men movies as it can in coming years.
That means not only more movies, but so many opportunities to put Spider-Man's face or Captain America's iconic shield on any number of products. So what can you purchase? Come along as GameSpot looks back on the very strange history of some of Marvel's most bizarre products ever made.
Spider-Man: Rock Reflections Of A Superhero Album
Long before Spider-Man bombed on Broadway, the wall-crawler had his own album of 1970s rock music that was... also bad. The story of the album was narrated by Stan Lee, though, so that's something.
Image: Lifesong Records
Life-Sized Hulkbuster Statue
This replica of Tony Stark's Hulkbuster armor from Avengers: Age of Ultron costs $21,500. Is it worth it? Who knows, but it would be an intense addition to your living room.
Image: Beast Kingdom
X-Men Cologne
Who doesn't want to smell like an a sweaty mutant warrior that smokes cigars? Thankfully, Marvel bottled that essence for its most curious fans.
Image: Marvel via Fragrance X
The Avengers Waffle Maker
This thing makes waffles in the shape of the Iron Man, Captain America, Hulk and Thor logos. Plus, it's non-stick, just like you're favorite superheroes. Now if only they sold Spider-Man maple syrup or Scarlet Witch butter.
Image: Marvel via Amazon
Wolverine Beard Comb
Nothing says manly like a beard comb in the shape of Wolverine. It's very useful if you're trying to sculpt your face like Logan's.
Image: Beard Gains
Thor Dumbbell Alarm Clock
It's an alarm clock, but it's also ... a dumbbell? While this seemingly has nothing to do with the character Thor or his movies -- save for having the name Thor emblazoned on it -- it still exists.
Image: Marvel
Incredible Hulk Goggles
Don't get him wet. You wouldn't like him when he's wet.
Image: Swimways via Amazon
Spider-Man Bed Cover
This cover turns a twin bed into a giant Spider-Man that wants you to sleep on its belly. This should give even a hardened Spider-Man fan nightmares.
Image: Incredibeds
Baby Groot Cutting Board
While this certainly does the trick as a wooden cutting board, there's something incredibly disturbing about slicing veggies on somebody's face--even if that person is a tree.
Image: Marvel via ThinkGeek
Ceramic Luke Cage Swear Jar
Luke Cage fans will remember the coffee can used as a swear jar in the Netflix series. For some reason Marvel decided to re-imagine it a ceramic piggy bank, removing any possible cool points you'd get for having one.
Image: Marvel via ThinkGeek
Spider-Man 3 Dark Whopper
Yes, Spider-Man 3 did have its own burger, celebrating the arrival of Venom. The Dark Whopper included black pepper cheese and ketchup, along with a dark grill sauce.
Image: Burger King via YouTube
Infinity Gauntlet Earrings
If Thanos knew getting his hands on the Infinity Stones was this easy, he could have avoided so much trouble. These earings are made from surgical grade stainless steel and encrusted with six Infinity Stones.
Image: Marvel via ThinkGeek
Captain America Slow Cooker
If you're going to make chili, you should do it with the power of Captain America, right? Honestly, the idea of Marvel kitchen gadgets is strange indeed, but this slow cooker still looks pretty cool.
Image: Marvel
Ant-Man Ant Farm
As weird as this thing is, it also makes perfect sense. Why wouldn't there be an Ant-Man ant farm?
Image: Uncle Milton via Amazon
Spider-Man Fishing Equipment
This set includes everything you'll need to catch fish like Spider-Man would -- you know, if Spider-Man ever fished. It includes a fishing pole, net, tackle box, bait, lures, and sunglasses.
Image: Bundle via Amazon
Avengers Bath Set
If Iron Man, Hulk, and Thor weren't created to sell hand soap and shampoo, why do they even exist?
Image: Marvel via Amazon
Iron Man Augmented Reality Experience Mask
This augmented reality masks makes you look like Iron Man while adding an AR experience into the mix. Really, it's just a fancy chunk of plastic to slip your smartphone into.
Image: Hasbro
Groot Ring
Someone might buy this as an eternal reminder of Groot's sacrifice for his fellow Guardians of the Galaxy. It's hard to imagine anyone actually wearing it, though.
Image: RockLove Jewelry via ThinkGeek
Infinity Gauntlet Silicone Tray
If you're making ice, you may as well make some in shape of the Mad Titan's favorite glove.
Image: Diamond Select
Spider-Man Pocket Watch
Whether you are a steampunk loyalist, an old train conductor, or someone who simply loves a good pocket watch, chances are you never thought you'd have a Spider-Man themed one.
Image: Marvel via Amazon
The Amazing Spider-Man Nail Polish
It's a bit strange that there was a line of nail polish themed to The Amazing Spider-Man. Some of the colors make sense, like the red, blue, and green -- the movie's villain was the Lizard, after all. But why white and orange?
Image: OPI
Captain America Shield Backpack
Wearing Captain America's shield on your back feels amazing. As backpacks go, though, this one is very impractical -- books and laptops aren't round.
Image: Marvel via ThinkGeek
Thor Hammer Light
This might look like someone has buried Mjolnir, Thor's prized hammer, in a wall. But it's actually a light that glows in blue.
Image: 3D Light FX via Amazon
Wolverine Electric Guitar
Most people buy guitars because of how they sound or who makes them. Still, though, there's bound to be people who buy them because Wolverine is drawn on them, right?
Image: Peavey